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Reentering the dating universe can be a little bumpy, as most anyone can tell you. First you have to negotiate what you want and need within yourself, and then turn outward to see what the beautiful world has to offer you. But one thing is sure, I am a femme woman attracted to masculine women, aka butches.

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Lipstick lesbian is slang for a lesbian who exhibits a greater amount of feminine gender attributes relative to other gender expressions, such as wearing make-up thus, lipstickwearing dresses or skirts and having other characteristics associated with feminine women. The term lipstick lesbian was used in San Francisco at least as far back as the s. InPriscilla Rhoades, a journalist with the gay newspaper The Sentinelwrote a feature story on "Lesbians for Lipstick".

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She dresses and acts in a manner that is considered conventionally feminine, and likes "feminine" things, like wearing lipstick—and other females. Main-character lesbians on TV tend to fall into this category more often, as it's often seen as "safer", unless the show is going for "edgy". They also often have things like long fingernails, unlike their more masculine counterpart.

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Lesbian and queer women all over the world have to face a lot of stereotyping and discrimination based on their sexual orientation, gender identity, and physical presentation. As a femme lesbian, I live this reality almost every day — and believe you me, there are are a number of things not to say to a femme lesbian. Not only are they offensive or undermining, but moreover, they're usually questions we've gotten a million times. I can only speak for myself here, but honestly

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They think we came to support our gay friend. And no one should be forced to do this. However, if you want to drop little hints about your sexuality, there are some easy tips which you can use without changing your entire style.

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All photos by Christopher Bethell. If you've been anywhere near Tumblr in the last few years, you might have seen an image of the Futch Scaleor one of its many variations. Initially conceived as a kind of continuum scale for lesbians to describe where they fall on the femme-butch spectrum, it has since developed into a long-running internet joke in the LGBTQ community.

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Though queer people are gaining more and more visibility in mainstream media and society, that doesn't mean that the images we're presented with are always accurate or representative of who we really are and how we live our lives. And sometimes we're still disappointingly absent, especially when it comes to certain subsections of our community. Case in point: The dearth of images that authentically capture what it means to be a femme.

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Mignon R. Kennedy and Davis create the notion of butch not as an imitation of male presentation but instead as an appropriation of traditional male style. They distinguish that male style is transformed and given new representative value when worn by women.

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If you are just out and you want to signal who you are, that might not come entirely naturally. You might be wondering how a femme lesbian gets noticed and lets other lesbians—butches, femmes, and those in between—know that she is also a lesbian. Also, if you are in conversation with another lesbian, you can mention a gay organization you are involved with.

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Comments

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